My friend Joan of Moosestash quilting is hosting this blog hop, which I thought would be a blast!! These were our instructions: What’s your Fairy Tale? Slaying dragons, glass slipper, getting corners to match on our quilts, someone other than me taking out the trash, riding down the beach on a horse, with the “I can’t believe it’s not butter” guy…Hey, a girl has to dream! Joan cracked me up with this one! She said to put on our thinking caps and tell us what your Fairy Tale is.

Well, I thought this would be an easy one…but…not so much!! I feel very blessed to be living my fairy tale – retired, a wonderful and supportive husband, my daughter and her hubby who gave me my wonderful grandchildren! What more could a girl want? Well…maybe new knees without the surgery involved, which would definitely be a fairy tale come true! Instead, I chose this statement from Joan’s instructions. “I bet we can all get a laugh and a big dose of inspiration from you.” I don’t know about inspiration, but as I was trying to decide on what to create for this, I came across this and I think this might give you a laugh!

Storyland Jack: An Alabama Fairy Tale!

Most fairy tales begin with “Once upon a time,” but here in the south, it would probably go something like this: “Y’all ain’t gonna believe this, but here goes!” It’s a bit long, but I promise, I did shorten it!

Storyland is usually a pretty quiet place considering it’s citizens, which most of you already know. Most of the folk mind their own business and get along pretty well. In that sense you could say Storyland, Alabama is pretty much like anyplace else. If Storyland had a mayor, or chief constable, Jack (of Jack and the Beanstalk, Jack Be Nimble, Jack and Jill, and Jack Sprat fame) would be that person.

While sitting in his office minding his own business, the Cow and the Cat came bursting in. They are entertainers. Cat plays a mean fiddle and leads the band called Hi Diddle Diddle, and Cow has been performing her trick of jumping over the moon, as long as can be remembered. Here are their tales.

Cat’s Tale: Cat and his band, composed of Cat, Donkey, Dog and Rooster were the must have band for a wedding or party. Cat seemed quite nervous, licked his paw, cleared his throat and began. “We were playing at a wedding earlier today. It was a lavish affair, people were dancing and laughing. Cow here was doing her Over the Moon trick to great applause.” Here Jack interrupted, “Whose wedding?” He was somewhat hurt that he hadn’t been invited. Cat blushed and continued, apologizing that they “thought he knew it was Dish and Spoon, finally getting hitched after all these years together.”

Well, Dish and Spoon were finally getting married and Jack wasn’t even invited. Jack thought they were old friends. “So what happened?” Jack inquired. 

“That’s just it, “said Cat. “Nothing happened.” “They were getting married…I was playing the wedding march expecting Dish and Spoon to come down the aisle but they didn’t come.” Jack asked if they got cold feet? “No, you ninny (said Cat). They vanished. They went missing.”

People in Storyland don’t just simply disappear. Dish and Spoon were a pretty cowardly pair and Jack knew they wouldn’t survive very long without regular meals and a warm place to live. He considered the usual villains such as Big Bad Wolf, The Wicked Witch, The Evil Step Mother, but couldn’t imagine them being interested in ordinary folk. Jack thought they had just got nervous and ran off, when Cow spoke up.

Cow’s Tale: Cow didn’t think they were kidnapped either. He thought they ran off so they wouldn’t have to pay for the wedding. Cow said that on her last jump over the moon she looked down and saw them run off together holding hands and there was no one with them. Jack thought they had just changed their mind, as everyone is entitled to do. Cow looked at Jack as if he had a screw loose and asked if they wanted him to investigate to see what had happened to them. Cow and Cat said they didn’t really care what happened to them, they just wanted to get paid!! Now Jack understood that it was all about the money – it’s always about the money!

Off to The Queen of Hearts (the swankiest place in Storyland). He couldn’t figure out how Dish and Spoon could pay for a wedding like that. His questioning began with Little Dog, who was always laughing.

Little Dog’s Tale: Jack, speaking to little dog said, “Looks like it was going to be one fine party,” and Little Dog laughed like it was the funniest thing he’d ever heard. Little Dog told Jack he should have been there. All the guests were eating and drinking, music was playing, cow was doing her crazy thing and when the bride and groom were expected to take their vows, nobody showed up! Jack asked which way they went and Little Dog told him out through the kitchen door. As Jacked walked through the kitchen he noticed the big pots of food and asked what would happen to all of it. Little Dog explained that they would give it to the poor – some to The Old Woman who Lives in a Shoe and some to Old Mother Hubbard.

The Dish and the Spoon’s Tale: Jack walked over to the Old Woman Who Lives in a Shoe’s house and knocked on the door. She asked who was there and cracked the door open when Jack answered. He could see all the children sitting at the table. He knew something was amiss because those children were never quiet or well behaved. Then he noticed their wasn’t a plate or a spoon on the table and knew something was definitely wrong. About that time Little Dog came around pulling his wagon with food piled high from the wedding and unloaded most of it there, then Little Dog moved on to Old Mother Hubbard’s house to deliver the rest.

Jack snuck back to see the children still sitting at the table and the Old Woman carrying piles of food into another room at the back of the house. Jack then snuck around back to see what was going on and there was Wicked Wolf gorging himself on the food and two little children sitting bound and gagged in the corner. Jack rushed in and arrested Wicked Wolf.

Dish and Spoon were hiding out in Old Mother Hubbard’s cupboard and when questioned about the day’s events they told this story:

“The Wicked Wolf threatened to eat the Old Woman’s children unless she fed him something better. Being frighted and poor, the Old Woman got together with Old Mother Hubbard. They scraped together what little food they could but the wolf was not satisfied and demanded more. Out of desperation, the two old women urged Dish and Spoon to fake their wedding and run away at the last minute. All of the uneaten food would go to the wolf. It was a clever plan and makes a heck of a good story!”

Credit: You can read the story in full at here if you would like. It was written by Harris Tobias. The above is my shortened  version of the story.

After reading this, I did a little bit (well maybe a good bit!) of digitizing and stitching and restitching to get it just like I wanted. Then had some fun quilting with free motion, rulers, and my ProStitcher. Heck, I even had a fun run to my LQS for that pretty mulled cider grunge!! And here is my finished product. Those who know me well know I hate to make binding and would much rather buy Moda binding on a roll, but I actually made this so it would match! Shock and awe, right??!!!

I hope you enjoyed this fairy tale. This little quilt measures approximately 24 x 28, and will be donated to our guild for silent auction at our QuiltFest next year. Thanks so much for stopping by and indulging me the long read!